Top 10 Anti-Date Films
Or alternatively, the top 10 films a guy wouldn’t want to take a girl to on a date. We’ve all heard of the date movie. We’ve even heard, or unfortunately seen, “Date Movie”. But there are films out there that you would definitely not take your date to.
If a great movie for that first outing between girl and boy is about love, romance, happy people, and happy endings, then the anti-date movie doesn’t recognise romance, it shuns love, celebrates misery, and ends unhappily.
Things you’ll learn from the following top 10 list: Michael Douglas movies are not for taking dates to.
So if you really want your date to end without a final kiss, or you just want to have a laugh at your other halves’ expense, check out the following ten films.
10. Switchblade Romance (Aja, France, 2003)
Jealousy is a killer in Aja’s violent slasher film. If the before-movie meal was spaghetti bolognese prepare to see more of it on screen…and in your date’s lap!
9. Blue Velvet (Lynch, USA, 1986)
The tendencies of a sociopath, the sexual allure of voyeurism, bizarre drug taking, dry humping, and a touch of sadomasochism – not the sort of thing to enjoy after dinner and dry white wine.
8. Audition (Miike, South Korea/Japan, 1999)
This is not the way to treat a woman. The consequences might just be more off-putting for the guy than the girl.
7. Spanking The Monkey (O. Russell, USA, 1994)
Son goes home from college and wants to sleep with his own mother. The sentiment is reciprocated. Hardly the best first impression.
6. Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf (Nichols, USA, 1966)
…and we all live happily ever after – or do we? Mike Nichols’ tale of ‘romance’ after marriage.
5. The War of the Roses (DeVito, USA, 1989)
Danny DeVito’s celebration of love and marriage – NOT! Michael Douglas and Kathleen Turner turn their wedding vows into a declaration of all out war.
4. Bob & Carol & Ted & Alice (Mazursky, USA, 1969)
A great film to watch if you want to tell your date multiple partners are a good thing. Also great, for those in a long relationship, to tell that loved one you now want to give swinging a go.
3. Sunset Boulevard (Wilder, USA, 1950)
Billy Wilder’s film tells us to partner up for all the wrong reasons – greed, social mobility, career progression, personal identity. Just the tonic for a first date then.
2. Fatal Attraction (Lynn, USA, 1987)
Michael Douglas doesn’t have the best record with women in his films. Not only is he here on this list in “War of the Roses”, “Basic Instinct”, and “Fatal Attraction”, he also found troubles in “Disclosure” after having office nookie with Demi Moore. In “Fatal Attraction” he thinks affairs are good and finds that they most certainly are not. If there’s any rabbits reading please take my advice and avoid this movie!
1. Basic Instinct (Verhoeven, USA, 1992)
Paul Verhoeven’s celebration of Sharon Stone’s body is more likely to result in being slapped than slept with. Murder, sex, drugs, breasts and bottoms, Michael Douglas humping again, and Sharon Stone giving us the most erotic police interrogation scene ever filmed, “Basic Instinct” is as anti-romance as they come.